The Secret to Happiness: Being Vulnerable

Posted by on August 9, 2011

The Secret to Happiness: Being Vulnerable

I happened across Brene Brown recently. And as a result I have shifted the way I view the world.

I’ve always known that being yourself, speaking your truth, being authentic were important ingredients to why I am here on Earth. I knew those things were essential to simply existing, but I’ve never thought about it in regards to being vulnerable. In Brene Brown’s TED speech – The Power of Vulnerability – she gives poignant evidence to, well, the power of being vulnerable.

Her speech initially caught my attention because I wholeheartedly agree and believe that we are here for connection – connecting to each and every person, plant, and animal even while carrying around these body suits.

But here’s where my world shifted: In order to have true connection, you must be vulnerable. Oh shit.

I was thinking back on my own life where I’ve been vulnerable. For the first 29 years of my life, I had never experienced vulnerability. I lived the life of perfection. I was the perfect good girl. I had the perfect grades. And I had the perfect marriage. I was miserable. And then something shifted. I had to tell people that I was getting a divorce. In getting a divorce I felt like a failure. I was no longer perfect. I was vulnerable. And suddenly I was so much more likeable among my friends, coworkers, and colleagues. And for the first time I got a taste of true connection. Ever since then each and every time that I am vulnerable, the Universe rewards me in some way. And most likely you too.

Vulnerable is the willingness to say ‘I Love You’ first. It’s the willingness to do something without knowing the outcome just for the sake of your soul. Being vulnerable is being you without caring what others think.

Just saying the word ‘vulnerable’ is hard, let alone being vulnerable. Another way to think of being vulnerable is being seen. Yes, that’s even scarier, right? But we are at the point of our evolution where it is essential to be our true selves.

And I do believe that it is the secret to happiness. And here’s why. As Brene says, if you block out or numb being vulnerable, you also block out or numb the good stuff too – joy, gratitude, caring, empathy, etc. You can’t choose your numbing. It’s all or nothing.

Be Vulnerable.

Be Seen.

Be You.

Love you.